“It only seems as if you are doing something when you’re worrying.”
~Lucy Maud Montgomery
WORRIED?
How much of your life is consumed by worry? That gnawing, aching, lung-crushing, mind-numbing belief that things might, will or have gone wrong.
Most worry is completely unfounded. Much of what you’ve dreaded has probably never come true. And the bad things that have happened, likely came as a complete surprise.
Fortunately, worry is not a feeling outside your control. It may simply be a bad habit, like biting your nails, smoking, or leaving the toilet seat up. The anxious feelings are a result of habitual, problematic thinking.
The good news is, you control your thoughts.
Have you convinced yourself that by worrying you are caring, that you are warding off disappointment or disaster, that you have more control, or that you are actually doing something productive? If your worrying cannot be alleviated by engaging in some specific action, or if you cannot take action in the near future- it’s probably a waste of your time and your precious energy.
Ask yourself, “Am I willing to stop worrying?” And then, like any other bad habit, take control and break it.
RECIPE FOR WORRY
Cognitive Therapy (which looks at how our thoughts, affect our feelings and our behaviors) has proven to be highly effective in the treatment of anxiety. One Cognitive technique is called Thought Stopping.
1. When you experience anxiety or worry, identify your specific thought.
2. If there is an action you can take (e.g. I should really make this phone call), then either choose to do it or decide when you will do it.
3. If it is an unproductive worry (one you can do nothing about) say, either out loud or in your head, “STOP!”
4. Now, replace the negative, worrisome thought with a more supportive and productive thought. Just like any habit, you must replace old behaviors with new behaviors.
This will take time. There’s no Nicoderm or patch for this one-just good, old-fashioned effort.
